Mas quotes.

diff --git a/fortunes/cronica.fortunes b/fortunes/cronica.fortunes
index 4642f59e730a73f4318bc09e09591ff794c88d12..92e43a27b63c86205ffab138a46d971a768743b3 100644 (file)
--- a/fortunes/cronica.fortunes
+++ b/fortunes/cronica.fortunes
@@ -43,9 +43,6 @@ PENE MUTILADO POR PENETRAR UNA ASPIRADORA
 CHINO ATRAPA COTORRAS
        -- Crónica TV
 %
-CHINO ATRAPA COTORRAS
-       -- Crónica TV
-%
 HOMBRE DESNUDO AMENAZA A LOS VECINOS CON UNA "KATANA" DESDE SU BALCON
        -- Crónica TV
 %
@@ -57,3 +54,6 @@ RENUNCIO PARA IR A REZARLE A SAN CAYETANO
 %
 TOTALMENTE EN "PELOTAS" JOVEN CANTÓ EN LA PUERTA DEL GRAN REX
        -- Crónica TV
+%
+"CIRILO" Y "SIRACUSA" DE "SEÑORITA MAESTRA": UNO MUERTO Y OTRO PRESO
+       -- Crónica TV

diff --git a/fortunes/seinfeld.fortunes b/fortunes/seinfeld.fortunes
new file mode 100644 (file)
index 0000000..9aec125
--- /dev/null
+++ b/fortunes/seinfeld.fortunes
@@ -0,0 +1,59 @@
+I am so psychosomatic it makes me sick just thinking about it!
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+It's not a lie, if you believe it.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+G: I don't want hope. Hope is killing me. My dream is to become
+   hopeless. When you're hopeless you don't care. And when you
+   care, that indifference makes you attractive.
+J: So, hopelessness is the key?
+G: It's my only hope.
+       -- George Constanza & Jerry Seinfeld
+%
+Pity's very underrated. I like pity. It's good.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+Yeah, I'm a great quitter. It's one of the few things I do well. I come from a
+long line of quitters. My father was a quitter, my grandfather was a quitter...
+I was raised to give up.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+You can do better than me. You could throw a dart out the window and hit
+someone better than me. I'm no good!
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+I always get the feeling that when lesbians look at me, they're thinking,
+'*That's* why I'm not a heterosexual.'
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+Borrowing money from a friend is like having sex. It just completely changes
+the relationship.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+'It's not you, it's me....'? You're giving me the 'It's not you, it's me'
+routine? I invented 'It's not you, it's me.' Nobody tells me it's them,
+not me. If it's anybody, it's me.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+For me to ask a woman out, I've got to get into a mental state like the karate
+guys before they break the bricks.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+Instead of doing a wash, I just keep buying underwear. My goal is to have over
+360 pair. That way I only have to do wash once a year.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+You should've seen her face. It was the exact same look my father gave me when
+I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+Bald men with no jobs and no money who live with their parents don't approach
+strange women.
+       -- George Constanza
+%
+Hey, it's George. I got nothing to say.
+       -- George Constanza, leaving a message on Jerry's answering machine
+%
+I would drape myself in velvet if it were socially acceptable.
+       -- George Constanza